The United Nations

The United Nations performs as a clearinghouse for the New World Order, acting as a central hub from which our various conspiracies operate. It also provides political connections, allowing us to communicate worldwide. At the New World Order, we view the United Nations as the crown jewel of our evil conspiracy plans, and it is with great pride that we showcase this fine organization.

COMMON KNOWLEDGE:
The United Nations was formed at the end of World War II, ostensibly as a means of preventing another such calamity. Cleverly disguised as a benevolent organization dedicated to peace and human rights, the United Nations actually intended to form a planetwide government designed to usurp the sovereignty of the United States and other countries. This plan was the brainchild of former Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) members, who left to form their own group—the Informal Agenda Group (IAG)—in 1943. The IAG orchestrated the creation of the United Nations with other members of the CFR and prominent communists. In fact, the United Nations went so far as to adopt the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, a document full of such evil concepts as freedoms of speech and religion, the right to a fair trial, and the abolition of slavery.

 

The United Nations headquarters, the place from which our alien masters will rule with an iron fist when they take over the planet. This shot demonstrates the breathtaking view of our building from an unmarked black helicopter.

From its central position as the control center of the New World Order, the U.N. is able to coordinate activities on a planetary basis. The United Nations is the central force in our plans to bring Chinese troops into the United States, and gathers intelligence and harasses our enemies through the use of unmarked black helicopters.

The United Nations has also created an enormous weather machine designed to destroy American farms with tornadoes (as Norm Olsen revealed to the U.S. Congress in 1995) and to cover the Earth with snow and ice. That way, we can convert most of the planet into a ski resort for the space aliens. This is why the U.N. uses white tanks and blue helmets.

The United Nations runs several concentration camps throughout the United States. These camps are largely unused, but will be filled with white, heterosexual, gun-loving, Christian Americans when we complete our takeover of the United States and create ten “supra-nations” to fulfill Biblical prophesy.

THE LESSER KNOWN HISTORY:
The United Nations introduced the U.S. income tax in the 1913, thirty-five years before it was founded. (This was done using time travel.) The goal? To make sure that the U.N. would have substantial funds for purchasing unmarked black helicopters, white tanks, and weather controlling machines from Lex Luther. (As it turns out, Lex Luther was also a fictional character, but he cut us a great deal on the weather machine.) As a central part of our New World Order conspiracy, and the political instrument through which we will wield our power, the United Nations is sure to remain the cornerstone of our plans to conquer the world.

Updated Jun 16, 2002


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